Published in Human Parts·PinnedYou’re Supposed to Be a Little Bit SelfishMany of us neglect our own needs to avoid seeming self-centered — and then we wonder why we’re so unhappy — In my early twenties, the subject of “selfishness” came up frequently in my therapist’s office — specifically, my fear of being selfish. In my attempts to avoid selfishness, I was living in its opposite — and equally self-centered — extreme: self-negation. My therapist explained it like a thermometer: Boiling hot…Buddhism5 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·PinnedA beginner in Buddhism?This advice may surprise you First, some context. I grew up in Alabama in the 1970s. Which is to say, I grew up without any real separation of Church and State. So although we were not a church-going household, I received a fairly typical education in that region’s mainstream religion. …Buddhist7 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·PinnedOnly One Thing is Truly YoursCould a focus on aging, sickness and death relieve your anxiety? The teachings of the Buddha are countercultural in the most radical ways, and there is no better example of this than the teaching known in Buddhism as the Five Reflections. …Dhamma6 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·PinnedRight View on the Eightfold PathTo find our solution, we must first see the problem We’ve looked at the Buddha’s Four Nobles Truths, with a promise to explore his Eightfold Path in some detail. Here, we begin with an explanation of the beginning of the Path, Right View. Sometimes people prefer the phrase “Wise View”…Buddha7 min read
Published in The Narrative Collective·PinnedI Haven’t Burned Out Despite 1000s of Trauma ClientsThere’s power in being a supporting actor — Temperamentally and statistically speaking, I’m a prime candidate for burnout even at the best of times. A serious child in a family that dealt with various mental illnesses and addictions, I was reading This Stranger My Son in the fourth grade. I was not unique among future therapists. …Life4 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·Updated Aug 12, 2021Right Speech on the Noble Eightfold PathThe Metta Sutta as the heart of nonviolent communication When we take the traditional Five Precepts as part of a dedicated Dharma practice, we are first clearing our path of what is harmful. This is why the precepts are voiced in terms of what we don’t want to do. They…Buddha5 min read
Published in The Narrative Collective·Aug 2, 2021I Haven’t Burned Out YetBut if you have, you’re not wrong — A year into the pandemic, I posted an article in response to an AoE prompt about burnout. That article, I Haven’t Burned Out Despite 1000s of Trauma Clients, looked at one specific thing that can help a therapist prevent burnout. It got pretty good feedback. …Empathy7 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·Updated Aug 8, 2021Right Intention on the Eightfold PathLet’s assume — for the moment — that you want to be free Earlier this month I enjoyed a rich couple of days with ministerial students who were together for their first in-person retreat at Heartwood Refuge in North Carolina. These were 25 or so people — a beautiful array…Buddhism8 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·May 20, 2021Gimme Space!Allowing is a dance I first posted this article on my own website three years ago, when colleague Karen Moran and I were leading a class in Mindful Parenting. The framework for the class was built on the “5 A’s” of mindful loving — Attention, Acceptance, Appreciation, Affection and Allowing…Mindfulness3 min read
Published in The Fifth Posture·Updated Aug 8, 2021Affection is Not OptionalTouch has never been more important I first posted this article on my own website three years ago this month, back when colleague Karen Moran and I were leading a class in Mindful Parenting. The framework for the class was built on the “5 A’s” of mindful loving — Attention…Dave Richo6 min read
